I know, I know...

If you've read my past entry about New Year's Resolutions, then you will know that I have failed to keep one very important one - which is to keep you all up to date more often. It's been a couple of weeks since I last wrote something... I'm sorry!

Actually, I'm sad to say, I haven't been keeping a lot of my New Year's Resolutions. Ahhh! I'm such a failure...

Just joking.

A few days after I wrote my TEN resolutions, I watched the New Year's episode of View From The Bay and they were talking about the best way to stay motivated and keep your resolutions. The #1 tip was: Focus on ONE resolution and accomplish that. So instead of trying to simultaneously live up to the TEN (Trust me, I tried... way hard) I decided to focus on a select few.

1) I got a job. 2) I've been relaxing and doing more for myself and 3) I've been working on my choreography and trying to better myself as a dancer.

Surprisingly, it's been working. Although I still want to accomplish the other some days, I'm glad I'm taking these baby steps because I know I'm getting somewhere. It's better than nothing!

I went away these past couple of weekends, so the past 2 weeks have been hectic. School starts again tomorrow... I'm semi-glad only to truck through these last 2 semesters and finally graduate. I'm super excited because ya'll know what that means!

Eurotrip!

Not like the movie (even though it was funny), but I get to be away for awhile.

Anywho, I hope everyone is doing well! Hope you're working on your resolutions too!

Talk to you laters!

Honestly

So I wanted to thank Shebloggz for awarding me with the Honest Scrap award. I was way excited that someone was interacting with me on my blog! Kinda cool! =) Anyway, the rule is I have to tell you all TEN honest things about myself. Since you asked! Here you go! (Plus, I want my award).

I'm assuming that what they mean by say something honest about yourself, I'm letting you guys in on things you don't know, but things I wouldn't tell you in a normal conversation??? Am I making sense? Hmmm... Sorry!

1.) I'm currently working on my second feature length screenplay inspired by recent events that have occurred in my life. It'll be a riot

2.) Literally the day after I graduate, I'm planning to travel for a month or two around the world. I'm at a full load - 18 units, for the next 2 semesters. Woot!

3.) I am going to San Luis Obispo this weekend THEN Long Beach NEXT weekend, and I'm planning to get super trashed... during both.

4.) When I have dreams that later occur in real life (de ja vu), I convince myself that I'm psychic

5.) I have a pimple/cyst on the back of my neck. It's like a person. I know... super gross right? Anyway, it hurts like shit.

6.) I bought a pair of San Jose Sharks vs. Dallas Stars tickets (worth almost $200) as a Christmas gift for my parents... ONLY to find out later that my dad is gonna be gone that whole month... contributing to my already growing debt! Ugh. I'm super pissed.

7.) I believe with all my heart and soul of the kind of love where you two are the only ones in the whole world meant for each other. Call me old-fashioned! Gotta love that, "can't-eat, can't-sleep, reach-for-the-stars, over- the-fence, world-series kind of stuff." -It Takes Two (1995) Since we're being honest, hell yeah, I watched this movie.

8.) In another life, I was a sexy Salsa dancer living in 1930s Havana, Cuba, who moved to Classic Hollywood as an aspiring actress. Hmmm... that would actually be a really interesting era film no?

9.) I don't have a working TV in my bedroom.

10.) I used to be serious about becoming a doctor. HA! Noble career... really... but even I wouldn't trust ME with a life =/

Just being HONEST

=)

Down. Down. Down...

I just wanted to share this bit of me with the world. Like I said in my previous post, dance is one of my favorite ways of expressing myself.

Just because I am who I am, I'm not one to hold back feelings (and yes, it does get me in stupid ruts). Although, I am super duper honest when I need to be, I'm not one to put PEOPLE on blast. However, the situation itself inspired me.

I choreographed this piece as sort of a last emotional run for certain someone(s) who at a point, made me and women everywhere, for that matter, feel LOW. I've always felt that there was no need to feel bad for any emotion or feeling. That's why you say it right? And anyway, feelings are provoked, so no one should ever feel sorry for liking, caring, sometimes loving someone deeply even though it's not reciprocated.

Unfortunately... I did. At the end of the day, I felt sorry for myself and sorry that I was feeling these emotions that really meant something... to me at least.

Sad realization folks, but here it is.

Thanks for letting me share =)

You Bring Me Down by Leona Lewis


I look at it as, he brought me down, and I made some fun choreo for practice with my girls =)

Silhouette Shout out! <333

EXPRESS. Don't REpress.

I'd like to apologize for being AWOL for the past few months. I would always tell myself, "Seriously, just freakin' write!"

Since I last posted a blog, things got progressively worse, unfortunately. It would've helped to share, but sometimes you just gotta deal. In my case, an INTERNAL battle.

However! And there IS a however... this month has been a good one. A blessing from God. It's not because it was the holidays (which I hope everyone had a great one), but I was genuinely happy. It's been such a long time, but it was nice to remember the feeling. I finally had time. Time just for ME. (Note to readers: It is crucial to have "ME" time. Don't forget.) I had time to work on my screenplays, DANCE <3, Grown & Sexy nights with my girls, and most importantly, time with family. It's been good.

So you ask, "How do I start my year off right?" Good question. Just from experience, avoid the poisonous things, people, etc., that made your year crap you know? For example, EX OUT THE EXES! Meaning, don't go running to old flings, boy/girlfriends, hoping that a new year will bring a new and improved relationship... it won't. I mean it.

Self-control.

Ring in the New Year with family, friends, and a NEW outlook. You WANT the year to be a good one correct? Then know that if you work hard, 2009 will bring a new and improved YOU. Don't get discouraged. Just keep truckin'.

So anyway, aside from my usual "lose the impossible 15 pounds" or "BE ORGANIZED," which I normally fail to accomplish, I've added writing and blogging and "what have yous" that go along with it to the list. SO I'll be around. I shall do my best at least!

2009 is OUR year.

...Express don't repress...

In case I don't hear from you...

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

YOURS TRULY <3333

No good.

Rummaging.

Don't do it.

Inevitably, you will find something that reminds you of a time in your life that you would rather FORGET. In my case, a REGRET. And regrets are no good.

My ONE regret that eats away through my thick skin. I think a lot of us do our best to understand that things happen for a reason right? I know that. But that one thing... person ...haunts and taunts. This super vague image of someone who existed, so so long ago.

My own Pandora's Box. Literally... opened.

What sucks is that I knew. I had that "Uh Oh" feeling even before, that if I opened THIS box, there would be something that would pop out and say, "Remember me?"

Curiosity got the best of me. For sure.

Now here I am, confused and regretful of a decision that was made selfishly, YEARS ago, that changed my life. How I learned the hard way that a simple, "I'm sorry," won't ever make up for the damage. What goes around comes back around. I hate KARMA.

So would things have turned out better for me? Who knows.

I just want to forget my one regret.



(I changed the date of this blog to go along with this day since it just passed. I just wanted to say, Happy Birthday to YOU, wherever you are. I hope you're well and happy)